This storm kind of sums up our last year and a half as a family. Rocky, quiet, loud and bright! We have been through and seen so many things, most people will never (luckily) have to deal with (Matt's health).
Each morning I am reminded at what an amazing path God has set up for us. Although are lives may not be perfect, they're OUR lives, and we love every second of it (even when I get baby brain, or baby emotions!).
This morning I had an appointment at Pomona Valley Lab for a bunch of the typical pregnancy tests. Rh and all those other ones. I also had the 3 hour fasting glucose test (yes, this one is early, but there was some concern I may be pre-diabetic, and my new Dr. is awesome and was just making sure). OMG... This "liquid" that I drank was so gut wrenching. I wanted to puke, and me being all emotional, actually started crying while I was drinking it. Matt was with me all along, and was SO very supportive. They told me I had 5 minutes to drink it, and those were the worst 5 minutes of the day! This stuff is bright orange, and tastes like flat orange soda, but about 100x more sugar. Sickening sugar. Then the rush... Then the crash. I got through it, which I knew I would. Unfortunately, I will probably have to do it again. The worst part is sitting in a hospital for 3+ hours! Ugh...
So the entire time we were at the hospital, rain did not fall. Of course, Murphy's Law as Matt put it.... As soon as we left, it started to POUR! We went to Corner Bakery to pick up lunch to bring home, and stopped at Sam's Club for some of Matt's "Chemo Bread (after his Remicade, not chemo chemo, he gets tired and doesn't eat much, so he eats the Hawaiian Rolls for about a week). On our way home, it was a torrential DOWNPOUR! We made it home, only to find that there was a TORNADO warning headed our way! Yeah, in Califoria! Insane, right?! We enjoyed our lunch, watching the news, and watching and listening to the thunder and lightning.
What started as an anxiety day (didnt want to do the fasting thing), ended up being a really great day with my Matty.
This baby will be here sooner that we can imagine (even though it feels like forever!!), and we have already started picking out names that we love, deciding on the babies nursery theme, and I have even bought and ordered some really cute maternity clothes (won't be able to wear for awhile though :( )! My mom ordered me some Maternity Yoga shorts from Old Navy, and she also ordered me a book and DVD. She is amazing. When I have to go to work she makes me breakfast when I get there every morning :). Love her.
I am so grateful for all of the love and support I have from so many family and friends (my Facebook friends are awesome!), and I give my biggest thanks to God.
It's now 6:20, and I am ready for BED!!!
Monday, January 18, 2010
The Baby DanceMatt and I have been trying to become pregnant since July 4th, 2009. There were many factors and thoughts that came into play as our 6 months of trying became a year, and then became 1 1/2 years! We kept our Faith in God the entire time, and (tried) to remember that when it was meant to be, it would be. Month after month, we would do the "baby dance", and I would do the 2 week wait! Every month, I would be dissapointed. Matt was great at picking me back up and reminding me that our time will come. Matt had been on chemo in 2007, I may or may not have PCOS... There were so many questions. I'm sure it wasnt on Matt's mind all month, every month, but it was always in my mind, even if it was in the back!
This last December 15th, I decided to go see my uncle, who happens to be an amazing, caring Dr.. He told me that it's possible I would have PCOS, but there is no real way to check, without being invasive. He ran some blood work, and prescribed me a medication (non fertility) that he said may help, and if it didnt, he would prescribe Clomid. I came home, filled the prescription, but never started taking it. The medication is intended for diabetics, but has been found to work for people who have PCOS too. I was worried because when he checked my sugar, it was only 108 (to me, this is okay), and I worried this medication would make me all weird, dizzy, mess up my sugars, etc.
Meanwhile, I had started using a Clearblue Easy Fertility Monitor the same month. Each day came and went, and each day I would be bummed because it never showed a "peak" or "egg" day. I REALLY started to worry that something was wrong by this point. Now, I have used ovulation tests before, which showed I was "working", but still never conceived! Anyway, I finally told myself that I would start the medicine on the 1st day of my next cycle, so I could keep close track of my cycles, and the medicine working together. I also figured I would get through the Holidays and not worry about trying this month since my machine never showed an egg! I have had a cycle as long as 36 days before, and most of the time 29-34, so needless to say, mine were not "normal".
Finally, on January 4th, I turned on the monitor, and was amazed (slightly) that it said day 38! I thought to myself "could it be true?!", but then quickly doubted myself. I had told Matt that I wanted to test, and he said to go ahead and go buy one, even though we had been through this MANY other times! I ran up to the 99c store and bought 3! I came home (this being evening), busted a test open and took it. I planned on not looking for the 5 minutes, but of course, had no will power! I turned my head about 30 seconds later and was AMAZED and CONFUSED to see TWO lines!!! A BFP (big fat positive!)... WHAT?! Could this be!? "MATT!!!!!!", I yelled! He came in, with his normal "Yeah, she's imagining a line again" look. Took a peak and said "It's not dark enough, take another one". Now, to those of you who have or do use ovulation tests, you know that the lines have to match up, or be darker than the other.... Matt's mind must have been in this zone. I said "Honey, it's a pregnancy test. A faint line wouldnt show up if you werent pregnant!!!". So I took another one, and sure enough - BFP!!!
I told my sister and mom, who were both SO excited and shocked as well. The next morning I took the 3rd 99c test, and an EPT as well. Again, 2 BFPs!!! By this time, my head is spinning! Could I REALLY be pregnant?! Who do I tell? When do I tell?! AWWW, now that the stress of trying is over, I have the stress of keeping it a secret, AND getting through these first 15 weeks! I had an appt to confirm the positive, which was a success! Then I had a Dr. appt., which tested my HCG as well, and was a success! 6 tests, and all POSITIVE! This must be REAL!
Today, I am 7 weeks, and 3 days pregnant with a baby due to premiere in early September (4th)!! Matt and I are SUPER excited, and cannot wait for time to FLY by!
I started this blog to record my 1st pregnancy thoughts, feelings, symptoms, worries, and excitement!
And can I just say that... God is AMAZING!!!