Sunday, November 7, 2010

You don't have to be angry all the time...

You would all be lying (well, most of you anyway) if you said that when you're angry it doesn't feels good. Or, being angry is easier than just letting it go. I would be a liar if I said those things. Sometimes when I get angry I don't let it go because it feels so much better than saying "I'm over it" or, "I forgive you". I'm not talking about feelings of sadness, or guilt. I feel bad when I feel those and want to feel better. But anger is a whole different story.

Last night I realized that being angry is easy to do. Especially with how my life has been this last year, I could easily go for a big steaming cup of rage at any given moment. But then this morning I woke up and I realized that I don't always see my anger from the other person's side, and I never give the other side of my anger a fair chance.

Why is it so much easier to be angry? I bet we could all come up with some great reasons, especially when we are in the heat of the moment. But what does it really accomplish? For me, it hasn't done a thing. I could sit here and find 10 (at least) things off the top of my head to be angry about, but this morning I realized that none are good enough reasons, and what would be the fun in staying angry all of the time.

I have been doing a lot of studying in the Bible. Reading scriptures, books and other study guides. I have been learning a lot. I wouldn't dare say I know a lot yet, but I am getting there, and what better a starting point than at the beginning?

Stop being angry. Turn away from fighting. Do not trouble yourself. It leads only to wrong-doing. Psalm 37:8

For so long now I have prayed, but never really "let go". My controlling instincts kick in and I feel like I NEED to be working on the things that I told God about. This morning I remembered this great poem that my mom had written on a simple cloth hanging in her bathroom for years.

You never did let go...

As children bring their broken toys
with tears for us to mend,

I brought my broken dreams to God,
because He was my Friend.

But then, instead of leaving Him
in peace to work alone,

I hung around and tried to help
with ways that were my own.

At last I snatched them back and cried,
"How can You be so slow?"

"My child," He said, "what could I do"
You never did let go."

-Unknown

This is me to a T. I never know how to let go. When it is dealings of my own, or within my family - I have great troubles just letting go.. and especially letting God.

My new goal, as of this morning is to let go and let God. I will try this. I will say this. When I feel angry, instead of simmering in the mood, I will let go, but not before I fall to my knees and tell God.

I have SO many things that I could pull out of a hat and be angry at/with. If I told you all of them, it would fill up this blog (which is eternally huge).

Another part of anger is acceptance, but more importantly - forgiveness.

If the one who hates you is hungry, feed him. If he is thirsty, give him water. If you do that, you will be making him more ashamed of himself, and the Lord will pay you. - Proverbs 25:21-22

Forgiveness rides right behind Anger on the big loud Harley. It taps you on the back and says, "Just let it go. Forgive them." But more times than not, you push that feelings right off the back of the bike. You rev the engine and you peel out down the angry highway.

If you forgive someone/thing, then you can stop being angry. Did you ever hear the story about the Amish community where a man walked into a school and killed several children? The first thing that the Amish did... They forgave this man and his family. They knew that there was nothing they could do in their power to this man, and they knew if they could forgive him that they could move on in their lives. While I watched this movie I thought, "NO WAY! I would be at this guys door with a shotgun!".... But within my new learning of the Word, and reading - I know why they forgave him.

When you stand to pray, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him. Then your Father in heaven will forgive your sins also. - Mark 11:25

This one spoke to me directly. Because I have a controlling bone (or several) in my body, I always feel that *I* need to be the one to punish someone. Boy, was I wrong. I actually learned this dealing with Evan's bullying situation. I did the right thing, and prayed about it. Now, this girl was punished correctly.

Do not say " I will punish wrongdoing". Wait on the Lord, and He will take care of it. - Proverbs 20:22

Now, I know that I will slip. But I am going to tuck this little virtual blog into a pocket and try VERY hard to remember it. Life is too short and too exciting to wallop in misery!

A God-like life gives us much when we are happy for what we have. - 1 Timothy 6:6